Inner Child Healing

Inner Child Healing




10 ways you may have been wounded as a child

  1. You were taught that it’s not OK to have your own opinions.
  2. You were punished when trying to speak up or act differently.
  3. You were discouraged from playing or having fun.
  4. You weren’t allowed to be spontaneous.
  5. You weren’t allowed to show strong emotions such as anger or joy.
  6. You were shamed by your parents or family members.
  7. You were verbally criticized/abused on a regular basis.
  8. You were physically punished, e.g. smacked, beaten.
  9. You were made to feel responsible for your parents and their level of happiness.
  10. You weren’t given physical affection, e.g. hugs, kisses, cuddles.

Ways to know if you have an inner child wound 

  • In the deepest part of me, I feel that there’s something wrong with me.
  • I experience anxiety whenever contemplating doing something new.
  • I’m a people-pleaser and tend to lack a strong identity.
  • I’m a rebel. I feel more alive when I’m in conflict with others.
  • I tend to hoard things and have trouble letting go.
  • I feel guilty standing up for myself.
  • I feel inadequate as a man or woman.
  • I’m driven to always be a super-achiever.
  • I consider myself a terrible sinner and I’m afraid of going to hell.
  • I constantly criticize myself for being inadequate.
  • I’m rigid and perfectionistic.
  • I have trouble starting or finishing things.
  • I’m ashamed of expressing strong emotions such as sadness or anger.
  • I rarely get mad, but when I do, I become rageful.
  • I have sex when I don’t really want to.
  • I’m ashamed of my bodily functions.
  • I spend too much time looking at pornography.
  • I distrust everyone, including myself.
  • I am an addict or have been addicted to something.
  • I avoid conflict at all costs.
  • I am afraid of people and tend to avoid them.
  • I feel more responsible for others than for myself.
  • I never felt close to one or both of my parents.
  • My deepest fear is being abandoned and I’ll do anything to hold onto a relationship.
  • I struggle to say “no.”


3 steps to heal the inner child 

  1. Acknowledge we all have an inner child. Even if you didn't have a big glaring trauma doesn't mean you don't have a wound. Or an unmet emotional need. Consistent moments in time where our needs were not met or acknowledged. Even if we don't have memory, we are carrying wound in our beliefs about ourselves or our reactions and in our relationships. “Things weren't that bad” We are looking back with adult awareness that’s why. So first step, is we have this. 
  2. Use triggers as a guide. Disproportionate reaction. Consistent big feelings over things that may not be that big in reality. What is underlying emotion? Find ways to honor, consider those emotions. 
  3. Put yourself first. Reparent yourself. Treat yourself. Feel good, empowered and positive about yourself especially after behavioral changes. 

Takes a lot of patience, repetition, consistent. Be gentle with yourself. It is SO rewarding. And now as an adult you get to meet your needs on your own. You deserve it. 


Madi Murphy

Intuitive healer, empowerment mentor, and cosmic consultant.

Named as one of the wellness industry top 100 luminaries by Well and Good and she has been featured in publications such as Vogue, Coveteur, MindBodyGreen, the New York Times and more.

Whether it is an energy session, intuitive divination, astrology reading- or if you’re ready to take it to the next level with a spiritual mentorship- her intention is to get you to your most confident, liberated, WILD and juicy self.



Hi! I love how informative and great your articles are. Can you recommend any other blogs that share Pocket Coffee recipe or any other coffee recipes? Thanks a lot!

payal nakhate

This is something I’m just getting into rn. I definitely have a lot of inner child wounds to unpack 🤦🏻‍♀️ but even just being aware & noticing how/when these wounds affect me in my day to day, is an eye opener and I’m definitely taking little, baby steps to not get so triggered by bs. Thanks Madi, amazing as always 💕


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